I’m 27 years old.
Old enough to have mastered the fundamentals of adulthood. Wise enough to know that I’ve still got a few missing stones in my pantheon of awesomery.
This list is one-part rallying cry to the universe — and one-part thorough reminder, to myself. Buddha knows, I need it.
Because we’re ALL unfinished sculptures of excellence, yes?
27 ways to be an (even) better person…
1. Maintain a vigorous sense of perspective. 99.9% of the things that seem absolutely urgent, completely infuriating, massively critical & totally MANDATORY won’t matter (to you, or the universe) in 100 years. Or even 100 days.
2. If your country is at war with another nation, make a concerted effort to be able to identify that nation on a map.
3. Learn to sit comfortably in silence.
4. Don’t go to life-altering concerts and spend the entire time peering through your smartphone & filming the proceedings.
5. When your mom wants to take your picture, let her. Even if you feel bloated, oily or disheveled. She doesn’t care. She loves you. Don’t harsh her mellow.
6. Pay attention to nuance.
7. Reign in the impulse to ‘fix’ everyone. Experiment with listening, nodding & not fixing.
8. Don’t be one of those people who is perpetually tardy, never has enough cash, chronically undertips, or straight-up flakes out.
Just don’t.
9. Come bearing gifts. A bottle of wine. A potted orchid. Homemade currant-lemon scones. Genuine compliments.
10. Hand-written thank you notes. Always, always, always.
11. Don’t ignore (or lie to) volunteer fundraisers on street corners. Make eye contact. Be a human being. Tell them, “no, thank you.”
Or my personal catch-all, “I respect the work you’re doing, but I prefer not to make financial decisions on street corners.”
12. Don’t whip out your smartphone for a surreptitious whirl through your incoming feed, when you’re socializing with (actual!) human beings. Who showered, dressed up & migrated across city blocks to be with you.
13. Know your limits. But transcend your limitations.
14. If you can’t remember the last book you read (because it was in junior high, and you just read the Cliffs Notes anyway) this is a problem. Remedy it.
15. Memorize (or write) one really good, solid toast. For weddings, bar mitzvahs & quinceañeras. Or impromptu celebrations.
16. Stop calling people ‘retarded,’ when you mean ‘dim-witted.’
And if you slip up once or twice, express profound remorse. Thrice in one evening? Slap yourself across the face. Grandly & forcefully.
17. Don’t assume you’ll be on ‘the list’ when your friend has a event, or that you’ll eat for free at their cafe, or that you’ll get a stack of free books from their launch party. Pay. Pay double. Show up. Be supportive.
18. Be KINDER than seems necessary. And more GENEROUS than seems reasonable.
19. Don’t say you will, if you won’t.
20. Don’t leave cruel, irrationally mean-spirited comments on perfectly lovely blogs. If something dramatically irks you, craft an elegant, respectful email. Get it all out of your system. And then delete it. You’ve got far more important things to do, no?
21. Learn how to pronounce the names of unfamiliar vegetables.
22. Keep it classy.
23. Get to the bottom of your Jealousy. Don’t be oblivious to your insecurities (or desires).
24. Make no secret of your disappointment, if indeed you have been gravely disappointed. But create a ‘teachable moment’ out of your distaste. Be vocal, and constructive.
25. Have an OPINION. It’s SO refreshing!
26. Treat the elderly with a combination of respect, awe & fascination. Ask questions. Lean into the stories.
27. Leave everything — apartments, national parks, people’s hearts —
in better condition than you found them.
And now, a brief word from our sponSOAR . . .
Remember your high school career counselor?
The one with the awkward ‘motivational’ posters of soaring eagles & stupefied kittens adorning her office?
The one who told you to raise your GPA, enroll in a few more AP classes —
and quit skipping gym, young lady?
She may’ve had a few solid points. But she wasn’t Sabrina Ali.
Sabrina Ali is the vocational strategist we all wish we had, back in high school. Inventive. Spiritual. Visionary. ENCOURAGING.
And, y’know, flat-out gorgeous. Doesn’t hurt.
Sabrina is in the business of activating human potential – and she’s led workshops in Canada, the US, Malaysia, Sweden, Norway, Mexico, South Korea, Thailand, Singapore, and beyond. Her coaching framework is based on the FIRO Theory® — the same methodology used by the US Navy. Ahoy!
She believes that no one exactly like you has ever walked on this earth — and that every cycle of your career evolution needs to feel meaningful.
Her latest offering to the ‘verse is The Bliss Kit: a digital guide to authentic career creation.
It’s a downright massive collection of inspiring tools, PlaySheets & strategies to help you re-orient your career & create a life of purpose.
Whether you’re making $10 an hour flippin’ veggie burgers or $100K a year as a corporate honcho,
The Bliss Kit has a slice you can use. Buy the whole Bible — or just a $20 Byte.
And re-invigorate your vocation — this time, with feeling.


Dear Alex,
This list is particularly soul-stirring and poignant for me because I am in the process of defining my personal brand of magic and getting CLEAR on what I want. As in, I’ve been scribbling in my journal for over an hour and teasing out the things that matter most to me and are sacred.
So it’s truly serendipitous, I think, that you published this post TODAY. Right now. I’m bowled over. Thank you for this. It’s my favourite kind of post, the type that reaches through the screen and gives my heart a big ol’ squeeze. The type that lets me know it’s OK to be a work-in-progress as long as I keep striving for excellence. Thank you. Thank you.
Oh, and I think your wee-book on magnetic clarity may have had something to do with my soul epiphanies as well. I read through it and told myself I’d “answer the questions later”, so perhaps I’m answering them right now as I pour my soul on the page? How wondrous. :)
Thank you again for your wit and fire. You are awesome. I love you. Total girl-crush going on.
Otiti