“All our final decisions are made in a state of mind that is not going to last.”
– Marcel Proust
We’ve all plodded through the dense fog of indecision. Sometimes, the fog descends for an hour. Sometimes, for a quarter-century. Or a lifetime. Sometimes, we become so accustomed to ambivalence that we forget what it feels like to choose. The clean, slicing pleasure of this, not that. Him, not her. Here, not there.
If you’re unhappily wrestling with ever-growing columns of pros & cons . . . with complexity, uncertainty and doubt . . . with self-imposed pressure, anxiety & fear . . . or the bland, butter-knife edge of procrastination . . . here’s a thought: just make a choice. Any choice. It will be imperfect. Life usually is. But often, a step in any direction is better than spinning in place.
Behold: 7 ways to choose — today. Something. Anything. Now.
1. Hang upside down.
Inverting your body — by swinging your head between your knees, propping yourself up in a headstand, or simply laying flat on your back with a slight backwards tilt — increases blood flow to the brain.
More blood means more oxygen. And more oxygen means more neurotransmitters — like norepinephrine (attention!), dopamine (memory! motivation! assessment!) and serotonin (happiness!) — flooding your system.
All the power-chemicals you need to sift through your options. So flip it. And figure it out.
2. Talk to your mom.
According to a study at the University of Wisconsin, simply hearing your mother’s voice has a calming effect, releasing bursts of oxytocin (love! connection! security!) into your system, just like a hug or spoontastic cuddle.
And it doesn’t matter what you’re talking about — just hearing mama’s dulcet tones is enough to trigger the all-natural happy-drugs. So call mom. Calm down. And choose.
3. Anchor yourself.
Some of the wisest & most decisive people I know have an Anchor Question that drives all of their choices.
Rachel Cole asks, “What am I truly hungry for?”
Dyana Valentine asks, “What are my super-conditions for greatness?”
Danielle LaPorte asks, “How do I want to feel?”
I’ve started asking, “How can I ASTONISH myself, today?”
Find your Anchor. And hold on tight. It’ll never lead you astray.
4. Go to your worst-case scenario.
If you’re an incorrigible worrywart, take yourself to the darkest possible outcome of your imminent decision. The literal, actual WORST thing that could happen.
It’s rarely as bleak as you think. It’s (probably) highly unlikely. And with very few exceptions, everything is survivable. You’ve got this. No question.
5. Consult a mystic.
If doesn’t matter if you ‘believe’ in destiny, past lives, parallel planes, angels, spirit-guides or G-O-D. All that matters is that you’re open to exploring symbols, patterns & signs.
Talking to a gifted intuitive can unlock new ideas, illuminate repetitive thought patterns & shed light on fresh possibilities. And any mystic worth his (or her) salt will adamantly remind you that your fate is entirely in your own hands — and that you’re more powerful than you realize.
6. Shock & awe yourself.
If you’re uninspired by your current menu of options, go rogue. Choose something counter-intuitive — against your very nature.
Break convention. Baffle the crowd. Surprise yourself.
If you’re a selfless, service-driven angel of mercy, play against character. Choose something selfish, decadent & wildly nurturing.
Just for kicks.
If you’re a self-lovin’ pleasure-driven machine, flip it & reverse it. Choose something generous, expansive, and thoroughly outside yourself. Mix it up.
It’s riotously powerful to make a decision that rattles your Cool. You never know where it might lead . . .
7. When all else fails — be relentlessly random.
Flip a coin. Throw the dice. Ask a stranger. Ask a madman. Write all of your options on helium balloons, and see which one hits the ceiling first. Read the clouds. Read the tea leaves. Read an ink blot. Twist an apple core. Spin a globe. Pluck petals off a daisy.
Almost-completely-always, it’s more important to choose SOMETHING — to un-stick, to roll forward, to swing into action — than to choose RIGHT. Side bonus: once you’re in motion, you’re more likely to figure out what’s right. Process of elimination. It works.
And then, there’s the most grounding remembrance of all: that very few decisions are irrevocable.
So choose NOW. With the grand reassurance that you’re only choosing . . . for now.
“I chose and my world was shaken. So what?
The choice may have been mistaken — the choosing was not.
You have to move on.”
– Stephen Sondheim
And now, a brief word from our sponSOAR . . .
When I need to make a decision — and I need a celestial pep talk to get it poppin’ — there’s only one woman I call: Theresa Reed, aka The Tarot Lady.
Theresa believes that Tarot is far from swoopy, loopy, woo-woo frivolity — it’s a powerful empowerment tool for confident decision-making & communication, and it’s all about the magic of choosing your future.
Theresa is to Tarot what Yo-Yo Ma is to the cello. The gold-standard of excellence — a consistent virtuoso.
Theresa does readings over the phone, via email & in-person — if you’re fortunate enough to live in her ‘hood. And between you, me & the Internet — she could triple her rates this instant, and she’d still be a remarkable steal.
There’s really nothing more to say. Buy a reading for yourself — or a gift reading for a friend. And prepare for a bolt of cosmic clarity.